ROLE OF PARENTS IN UPBRINGING CHILDREN

SUMMAIYA CHAUDHRY
(IIUI)

Being a parent is one of the most challenging but rewarding jobs anyone could ever adopt. It is the longest task and responsibility that an individual will ever perform. Parenting is an active process that demands that individuals use their skills and knowledge plan, give birth, raise and provide facilities to their children. The parenting process includes protecting, nourishing, and guiding the child. It involves a series of interaction between the parent and the child through the life span.Just as children go through the stages of development, parents also go through the stages of parenthood that require appropriate parenting stage responsibilities. These stages involve changing task and roles of both parents and children.Parenting is not an easy task. Becoming a parent is the easiest part, whereas, being a conscious and positive parent is a momentous task. Parenting is the most important role one faces in a lifetime. Parents who provide an encouraging environment for their children are rewarded when, as adults, their children realize a successful fit into the culture and society.Parenting concepts are deeply rooted in Pakistani families because of a strong, sustained tradition of educating and training young parents to accept, perform and establish enduring relationships and responsibilities with their children. Generally, the young mother is introduced to the nuances of parenting by way of the ‘hands on’ method at her parental home and under the guidance of her mother or an experienced family member. This practice could be the reason why the need for professional parent education usually is not expressed.Effective parenting enables children to build and develop positive behaviors and good, solid self-concepts that are important to functioning fully as a healthy adult. Parenting, as such, is greatly dependent on intra-familial issues that play a significant role in parental performance. However, parenting skills can be strengthened if parents learn about themselves as a ‘parent’ and about child development. Learning about the stages of human development helps parents understand about their ever, changing roles in the lives of their children and also what is expected of a parent at each stage. Parent education, in terms of learning and practicing good parenting skills to rear and manage today’s children, is essential. Modern-day children are more world-wise, having been exposed to many more situations than their parents, which may lead to a feeling of incompetence and helplessness on the part of the parents to manage their children. The relationship of parents with other members of family, relatives, and neighbours affects the general environment to which children are exposed.Finally, a father’s love and influence is as important as a mother’s in the life of a child. Fathers should overcome the internal and external barriers that exist to fulfill the duties of fathering. Positive parenting is the loving and supportive care provided by both parents. The parenting role has shifting its paradigm from fear-based to love-based. Positive parenting also can be termed as ‘conscious parenting’ or always seeking the betterment of children in the long run. Children need unconditional love and support from their parents for healthy development. Rationalizing, reasoning, giving adequate time and answering questions are essential on the part of parents. These childrearing practices promote the same future behaviors in their children. Support children emotionally at times when they need it most, so that they do not feel let down or alone. It seems likely that a child who feels emotionally isolated senses a breach of faith and trust on the part of the parents. Accept each child as an individual with his or her unique gifts and talents. Each child is different hence comparison with others is unwarranted. Showing positive feelings and appreciation for even the small work done by the child will encourage the development of confidence and a secure self-concept.The concept of parenting and parenthood varies according to region and varies within the rural, urban and tribal areas in Pakistan.